Wednesday 11 July 2012

We sail on rum!

Welcome aboard the Pineapple Lightning Galley.



So today the Capt’uns have assigned us to write another blog post. And today the theme is ‘Why did ya blooming cockroaches rough up this blaaawg?’

We scratched our heads, sniffed our hats and shot the monkey. No answer! Then we peeled some taters, washed the decks and swung on some ropes. Nope, still no answer. Then we stole some rum from the Capt’uns’ personal stock....hick...don’t tell them. And we have our answer!
Because we are the authors sailing the charted and sailed waters of publishing. And we are trying to net one shark each, an agent as some dare call them! And we hope that these sharks will lead us to remote islands, possibly with treasure chests filled with ... well, let’s just call them publishers, eh?

Besides this selfish goal of populating the world with our mindless drivel written down in neat little scrolls and then thrown away in bottles, we also had...hic...a smaller unselfish motive- Spread the anarchy!

You shee...we mean see...no not the big body of water you baboons, see as in look! Sheesh, we drink the rum and you guys are drunk...hic. Too many blogs try to better the writer by providing them helpful advice, interview authors and agents with ramblings on their path to success. In short, they help us pirates so much, that we become honest sailors fishing for agents with a lure of a well written book.

Scuttle-fish we say! Where is the fun in taming the seas? The agents become weary of polished query letters and manuscripts. Nay, we must sow some chaos. We add fun and craziness in an all new drink. It’s better than rum. Wait, nothings better than rum!

Anyways, we intend to enlighten you fellow pirates by means of this blaaawg. To the perils of drudgery of editing and revising and the haunted paths of the successful publishing by taking you to the other side of the world where we examine the fun side of books and authors. No more mindless hacking of the poor adverbs and more of telling than showing!

What say you, mateys?

P.S.- If any of you tried making sense of the above, we’d suggest reading it after drinking the rum below.

12 comments:

  1. You shot the monkey? Oh nooooes! I definitely love this blog because I laugh every time I read it. Fan of mindless drivel, I suppose. :)

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    1. We bought a new monkey. Nobody knows....shhhh... especially the Capt'uns. And mindless drivel is the way to go. Rarrrrr!

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  2. This is my favorite post yet for this prompt. Since we all pretty much have the same goals for our blogs anyhow, might as well make it all about the PIRATE VOICE!!!

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    1. Pirate voice indeed. Break out the rum. We have thirsty mates in need of pirate talk.
      By the way, we thank you graciously for the flattering comments!

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  3. I love that I found your blog through the blogfest. Pineapples and rum... YUM!

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    1. Fried in lightning, my dear Marisa! Crisped shocking juicy punch, we say.
      The blogfest is after all a pirate bonding time! Thank you.

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  4. Dude. Killer pics and and even more awesome post. Anarchy on the seven seas! Yesh...okay, I have been nippin' the rum a bit, perchance, but...hic...you said to...No maps, no laws, just huntin' down the treasure we are...my wild irish rose...hic...

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    1. The rum is free Ma'am Shell. The pics we stole and the treasure we see but can't get. But we still sail and hope...Yo Ho Ho and a bottle of rum!
      Thanks again for visiting. We will scurry over to your ship soon.

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  5. Sorry guys, the rum being gone is my fault. I may have dumped it to make room for smoothie ingredients, can't have everyone on the ship getting scurvy!

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  6. You definitely win the award for best pirate talk!!!! Great to meet you.

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  7. HAHA! Oh, you guys did AWESOME in writing this post. *hic* Wait, what? What? No, you hiccuped. Not me. I'm too young to drink.

    *Shifty eyes*

    ... :D Nice post!

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  8. Chaos and craziness? I'll drink to that! ...Or I might, were the rum not always gone...

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